Sunday, May 2, 2010

Melancholy's Wings...

So it is all really beginning to sink in right about now. On that level where you can't divert focus from anything negative or less than ideal, by only focusing on the "excitement" and "newness" of the whole venture. I have no idea where are life is going to go after this, if I'll like living over there, where we will end up after wards, etc., etc., etc.
I am gearing myself to not see my family for two years. Safari will be almost 9, Asher will be 6 the next time I see my family. My nephews and nieces will be so grown. Will they know me anymore? And honest truth, will I see everyone again? Cause you never know what life holds.
I am not trying to be negative or say I wish we weren't doing this. Cause truth be told, if God gave me the choice right now to keep moving forward or give me a solid life (a home, good income, close to family, all the "securities" of life, etc), I'd still pick this. Hands down, no contest.
And it's not cause it's not hard, cause it is very hard. Many times harder than I like to let on. Because I am always the happy, positive, ready to blaze a new trail, anything is possible kind of person. And that
is who I am, it's not just a facade. I really believe that way. But occasionally I reach those points where I have to pause and dig that conviction in a little deeper (Dan. 1:8), set my gaze a little stronger (Is. 50:7), and then keep moving forward.
Because more than anything in this life, I want to know that I truly lived out my purpose. That I never let "life" and my culture's expectations of life dictate what I do. That I would be one who helped usher in the kingdom of God onto this earth in the here and now because of the life that I lead, regardless of what it costs me. That I was willing to lay down my life to do my part in freeing people from the injustices of this world, even if it meant giving up my own comfort and opening up my eyes and heart to the suffering of real, breathing human beings all around me.
Because I know that my life is not my own. It is only on loan. And one day I will have to give an account of everything I did and didn't do. Ephesians 2:10 says, " For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them." So I know He has predetermined steps for me to take and works for me to do. And they are all for His glory, not for my own comfort and preference. I live for the day I will hear, "Well done, good and faithful servant". Cause in the end, eternity is all that matters. And everything I do now determines that.
If my life brings anyone closer to Jesus in any capacity then it is worth it. It is worth not having a home, a "normal" life for my kids, feeling broke compared to everyone else, being misunderstood by others, uncertain future, laying down dreams, hopes, and desires, and whatever else you got. I just have to trust that He has it all covered, and my kids covered, and that it is working for the good of my whole family. Because that's the God I serve.
So this was me, digging my conviction in a little deeper and setting my gaze a little stronger. Thank you for bearing with me and I hope maybe you gained something out of this... If not, I sure feel better! :)
Rita Springer sang one of my all time favorite songs, "Worth it All". Been a bit of my life's mantra :). Take a look at the video below. It is more for the song, less for the video. In fact not for the video at all! It's all I could find. Just listen, and I pray God would speak to your heart and give you grace for whatever lies ahead in your future.


Saturday, May 1, 2010

We're On Our Way!

Wow. So much has happened in the last few weeks that I don't really even know where to begin. Informatively speaking, we have been approved for our visa for Brandon to study in Australia for two years and have bought our plane tickets, so we are officially on our way! Hooray! What a headache that was and what an inward journey we went through to get that point.

I won't bore you with the details, but we really had to battle our way both spiritually and naturally to get our visas. But God is faithful (as always) and answered in such a special and beautiful way, just like our sister in Mexico prayed He would do. So thank you to all who prayed for us, those in Australia who gave me contacts to help me, and those who contacted the immigration dept. for us on our behalf, etc.

Our last official day here is June 28th, as we leave first thing in the morning on the 29th. So we will be trying to fit in as much visits with family and friends before then as we can, as well as get the rest of our stuff sold, and work as much as possible before we leave. It will be a busy two months. Wow... only two months.

Now, just some personal updates on our family. Brandon has started his temp job with the census. Don't know how long it will last, but it is a great opportunity and though I am still working, it gives me a chance to be home a little more. I miss being a mommy. And anyone that knows me, to say that is huge!!! As I do not have a natural tendency towards the domestic :).

We were also able to spend a week down in Padre for some much needed R&R as a family. We originally were just going down for a day or two to take some new clothes over to an orphanage across the border but were able to get a few days in at the beach as well. Happiness!!!

The week turned out to be so much more than we planned. I love how God does that so often. He uses our wimpy little plans and then blows our expectations out of the water! I will be blogging on that later as it truly deserves its very own and I want to invite you to be a part of something awesome that God is doing. So stay tuned!

A few pics of our week in S. Padre for you:

Safari is determined to be a surfer girl

Look out Baywatch!!

Brandon, Safari, and Asher passing out clothes

Safari playing with the kids

Love to you All!

The Griffins