God in the Caves Pt. 2

This week has been an absolutley overwhelming week for me. There is no denying the goodness and grace of our God. But let me back up a bit...
I wrote a blog on Friday, Oct 1st, but never got around to posting it because, as I had told Brandon, I just really felt like there was more. That God wasn't done speaking to me about the situation... I went ahead and posted it (called God in the Caves pt. 1) so you can see the progression of it all. So take a minute and read that before going on...

Sunday Morning. So while I was doing much better and had come to a place of greater peace, I was still struggling with the "why" of everything. Okay, so I wouldn't want anyone else's life cause that would forfeit all that is mine with God, but did it always mean life had to be difficult? Was there that many issues in my heart that I constantly had to be going through hard times to work it out. Because for the most part, that is what we are taught. When God takes us into difficult times, it is because your attitude, character, heart, etc. needs to be worked on, you're being tested, etc. Was I that messed up?
During worship on the following Sunday morning (not yesterday, but last week), I was sort of just talking to God about it all and then I saw a picture of some caves. And I felt God say to me that David (in the Bible) was who David was because he lived in caves. That he was able to write the Psalms that have spoken so greatly and ministered to millions for centuries because he lived in caves. That there are things that we can't know of God without spending time in caves. And David knew those things because of the time he spent in those caves. And I saw the entrance to the caves again and felt God say to me, " Would you live in caves to know me like David did?"
Wow. Just to know Him. Not cause I had all these horrible issues that needed to be unkinked (which I am sure there are), or I was constantly being disciplined by God, but just to know Him. He just wanted to be known by me.
And so I stood there for a minute thinking that over because I did not want to give an emotional "yes" with no stamina behind it. I settled in my heart at that moment that yes, God, you are absolutely worth spending time in caves for. That I will do whatever it takes to know You, and if that is the only way to know certain aspects about You, then in caves I will dwell (figuratively speaking, of course :).
I just stood there crying during worship because I was so overwhelmed with peace at whatever hardships we must endure (i.e. no car, restricted money and all that entails, etc., etc.) because I knew that I would know God in ways I couldn't otherwise. And for the first time I was actually wanting to be in the circumstances we were in cause I was so excited to know God in this way! I felt like the weight of a thousand bricks were lifted off my back. It was no longer about enduring but an absolute embracing the life God has given me. God amazes me so much how He can change a person with just a few moments in His presence.
So fast forward to later that day. We were at a person's house for a "superbowl" party for one of Australia's rugby leaugues Grand Finals. And long story short, we left that evening with a car!
I remember when Brandon came and told me they were giving us a car my first thought was no! I'm supposed to live in caves!! And then I thought it must be to help us get to and from work that night, cause their house was too far me to walk. And Brandon was like no, we get to use the car for good. And I told him no, they have other college students who live with them that use it. I was convinced he was horribly mistaken, that there was no way we were getting a car!
Well, yes, we got a car. This amazing, beautiful, and generous family gave us their extra car at no cost to us, with all registatration and insurance paid until June of 2011!! To say it is a "blessing" is an understatement and almost cheapens the whole affair. I am overwhelmed by God in this situation. I know that he was working in me over the weekend to prepare me for what He knew was already taking place.
And my whole week has been just one thing after another of being completely and undeservedly blessed by my Father through the body of Christ. From my tips at work to someone buying tickets for our family to go to the Jenolan Caves. I just am so overwhelmed. I know I keep using that word, but I don't know what else to say. There have been many times where I asked God, but what about living in the caves? This week has felt like anything but caves.
But maybe that is exactly it. Maybe the caves are never what we think they will be. We assume they are horrible and hard and dark. And without God they are. But when we experience God in those places we become overwhelmed with the goodness and beauty the caves provide. And we can be like David who was literally living in caves with absolutley nothing and still overflow with praise of the goodness of our God!
I pray you will be encouraged in whatever circumstance you find yourself in, that God's thoughts and plans for you are always good! Let us not hold back or shy away from where He is leading us, even if it seems scary or too difficult. We need to learn to trust Him that even in difficulty He will always lead us to His goodness. Let us press into Him and the things of Him, whatever that it requires of us, because God desires to be known by us in those places. The more we can lean into Him and less on ourselves, the more we can know Him. The more we know Him, the more we will experience and know His goodness. And the more we know of His goodness the more we can begin to see the beauty of the caves.
I pray immense blessings on you today and revelation of God's heart for you. You are more special than you know and we so appreciate and love each of you.
Love from the Griffin Clan